Joke of the day

The Mafia was looking for a new man to make weekly collections from all
the private businesses that they were "protecting."
Feeling the heat from the police force, they decide to use a deaf and
dumb person for this job.
If he were to get caught, he wouldn't be able to communicate to the
police what he was doing.
On his first week, the collector picks up over $40,000.
He gets greedy, decides to keep the money and stashes it in a safe place.
The Mafia soon realizes that their collection is late, and sends some of
their hoods after the deaf and dumb collector.
The hoods find the collector and ask him where the money is.
The deaf and dumb collector can't communicate with them, so the Mafia
drags the guy to an interpreter.
The Mafia hood says to the interpreter, "Ask him where da money is."
The interpreter signs, "Where's the money?"
The dumb man signs back, "I don't know what you're talking about."
The interpreter tells the hood, "He says he doesn't know what you're
talking about."
The hood pulls out a .38 and places it in the ear of the dumb collector.
"Now ask him where the money is!"
The interpreter signs, "Where is the money?
The deaf man signs back, "The $40,000 is in a tree stump in Central
Park."
The interpreter says to the hood, "He says he still doesn't know what
you're talking about, and doesn't think you have the balls to pull the
trigger."

Barcelona confirm signing of Liverpool striker Luis Suárez on five-year deal.

Liverpool have agreed to sell striker Luis Suarez to Barcelona on a five-year
deal for a fee of about £75m.
The Uruguay forward, 27, is serving a four-month ban for biting Italy's Giorgio
Chiellini during the World Cup.
Suarez, who won the PFA Player of the Year award last season after scoring 31
league goals, will travel to the Spanish club next week for a medical.
"Luis is a very special talent and I thank him for the role he has played," said
Liverpool boss Brendan Rodgers.
Suarez says he and his family will "always be Liverpool supporters".
Suarez, last season's Premier League top scorer, signed for Liverpool from Ajax
in 2011 for £22.7m, and had four years left on his contract.
"I hope you can all understand why I have made this decision," said Suarez,
who is banned from "all football-related activity" as he serves his third
suspension for biting an opponent.
"This club did all they could to get me to stay, but playing and living in Spain,
where my wife's family live, is a lifelong dream and ambition. I believe now the
timing is right."

'Fast & Furious 7' Racing Scene SCRAPPED We Can't Tolerate Another Death

A critical scene for the upcoming "Fast & Furious 7" came to a screeching halt
Thursday ... after studio suits pulled the plug because it was just too
dangerous ... too risky.Sources connected with the production tell TMZ ... the
shoot was being prepped at the Willow Springs International Raceway near
Palmdale -- 45 minutes from where Paul Walker tragically died.Members of the
crew tell TMZ ... producers brought in drivers who are "authentic street racers"
for the scene, where a souped-up yellow Chevelle races another car and
dramatically pops a wheelie, as bystanders stand right by the track and cheer.
A similar scene appeared in the first F&F.The scene was being prepped for
several days. Vin Diesel and other stars were there. But just before filming,
we're told the suits from Universal abruptly cancelled the shoot, saying it was
too dangerous.Someone who was at the track tells TMZ ... a person from the
production told some staffers they couldn't get the proper insurance to shoot
the race.But the word circulating among the staff is that they are extremely
cautious because of what happened to the star of their movie. They believe a
second crash -- even though Paul's was not film-related -- could jeopardize
the entire franchise.

Fun time for Cristiano Ronaldo and girl friend.

Ronaldo and girl friend Irina sheikh are arguably one of the best couple out there. The world best player posted this pix  (below) on his  twitter handle and captioned it "morning ride". Work hard, play hard.

YES!! Top signing!!

It's official! Alexis Sanchez has agreed to join Arsenal ! He is now a gunner.

FC BAYERN MUNCHEN SIGN JUAN BERNAT FROM VALENCIA

FCBayern have presented Juan Bernat to the media today. He is a young player with great potential. Do you think  Bernat will be a great signing.

DONE DEAL

Mario Mandzukic is officially an Atletico Madrid player.
The 28-year-old forward has penned a four-year deal at the Vicente
Calderon.
The Croatian figures to be a direct replacement for Chelsea's latest signing
Diego Costa.

Jennifer Lopez PUTTIN' IN TWERK Miley Ain't Got Nuthin' On Me!

She's 23 years OLDER than Miley Cyrus ... but Jennifer Lopez was out to
prove she's the real TWERKING QUEEN during a booty-bouncing performance
in Miami. JLo and her big 'ol butt hit the stage at the "iHeartRadio Ultimate
Pool Party" on the CW last night ... and threw her glutes around like a 44-
year-old CHAMP during her new aptly-named hit, "Booty."So, the real
question ... how doMs. Lopez's twerk skills match up with 21-year-old Miley??

Chris Brown He's No Gang Member But Bloods Are Cool With Him Representin'

Chris Brown is no gangbanger -- no matter how many gang signs he throws --
but one set of Bloods say they're cool with him acting like one ... because he's
paid his dues in the hood.Chris has aligned himself with the Fruit Town Piru
set ... dropping Bloods references on Instagram ... but leaders of the Fruits
(who'll remain unnamed) tell us Chris was never officially initiated.The Fruits
are down with Chris claiming he's a Blood because:- He's hired several of
them to work for him ... giving their Compton community an economic boost-
Chris comes to the hood and hangs out with them- He shot a music video in
the neighborhood ... and even included some of them in the vid- He donated a
thousand pairs of new shoes to Compton kidsPlus ... they don't mind the
national publicity they've been getting.This IS L.A. after all.